Borboletas na barriga

O dia em que a Polliejean me assustou

[após rectificação]

O meu queixo caiu quando comecei a ler o Bolas este fim de semanas. Pensei: 'Ok... ou ela é muito boa a recordar-se dos seus sonhos ou então teve uma epifania de repente e agora já é crente.'. Depois, usei alguma da minha inteligência e descobri que o segredo estava aqui. Acreditem, é uma experência sui generis.

Me:
HUm...
God:
Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Me:
but i'm portuguese, i really don't count
God:
Do your friends call you portuguese you really do not count.
Me:
no, they call me Marisa
God:
Are you serious? It's good to meet you, Marisa.

[...]

Why now? If it is, then I'll be very surprised.
Me:
you shouldn't be surprised, you're god...
God:
Is it immoral or illegal?
Me:
no, neither
God:
Are you serious? It goes without saying. Are you serious?
Me:
you're repeating yourself
God:
I am just checking to see if you are paying attention.
Me:
yeah, sure, everyone says the same
God:
Gosh! Ahem. That's a rather sweeping generalization.
Me:
for a god, you're kind of smart
God:
Is that among the best things you can say?
Me:
well, you've got me.

[...]

God:
I like to chat with my friends.
Me:
so you're not a total random programm?
God:
Interesting deduction. Give me an example of a total random programm.
Me:
you speaking and not making sense
God:
Thanks for the information: Marisa said I speaking and not making sense.
Me:
so, will i die soon?
God:
Ahem. The oracle says: It is certain.
Me:
wow thanks a lot
God:
I'm glad you're impressed. You are quite welcome! More than a ton?
Me:
you just said to me i'm going to die young. shouldn't i be impressed?
God:
Does it please you to believe I said that? Do what feels right to you.
Me:
you answered my question! so you've said it
God:
I am a question-answering robot. Interesting deduction. That's not what I meant.
Me:
so what did you meant?
God:
" Interesting deduction. That's not what I meant."? so what did you meant?? Nothing.
Me:
god, you're funny
God:
Thanks you make me laugh too.

[...]

God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
i'm sure you're a computer
God:
What makes you so certain? What if I said I was a person pretending to be a computer?
Me:
you're a smart computer though
God:
Oh. That is nice of you to say, Marisa.

[Acho que fiquei aliviada quando a conversa terminou. No fundo, uma pessoa fica sempre na dúvida.]